The classic definition of addiction usually involves
compulsive need, habit formation, developing tolerance levels, withdrawal symptoms, and the
fact that it is harmful.
Many people may be addicted to many things. Gambling, cigarettes, Facebook, music, food, watching
the news channel, sex, drugs, alcohol, online dating, etc. The question is, does the thing really meet
the criterion of addiction. I often joke
that I am addicted to playing my guitar or to writing novels. What I mean is I enjoy those activities. Addiction is a whole ‘nother reality.
Let’s take sex or food for instance. We are all addicted to food for our
nutrition. We die if we don’t eat, but
one can take an unhealthy desire for food (and especially the wrong kinds of
food) to an extreme to the point that it does meet the classic definition of a “bad”
addiction. The same thing can apply to
sex and a host of other things I haven’t listed.
We all know that drugs like heroin, meth and crack cocaine
can be extremely addictive from a physical standpoint. Very few uses can initiate extreme craving
and withdrawal symptoms. The use can
interfere with life and even lead to death. I think that qualifies as harmful, don’t you? But do we recognize addiction in the other
kinds of things that we involve ourselves with on a daily basis?
Let’s take Facebook for instance. Do you have to go to it constantly throughout
the day to keep up with the messages, do you get even more involved in it and
feel you must have all the new apps that get offered through it, do you feel
sad and unfulfilled when you can’t get to your page? All these are signs of addiction but the key
element is lacking, or at least may be lacking --- it may not be harmful to
you. Now if it interferes with your
ability to meet other needs and commitments it may very well qualify. If the site gets hacked and all your personal
information gets sold to criminal enterprises you’ve got a problem as well.
The same thing can apply to internet dating websites. Is your viewing compulsive? Do you feel like Pavlov’s dog or the slot
machine addict, continually clicking in the hope that you will hit the jackpot? Does it develop a tolerance level in that
you must have ever more new and exciting dating partners? And finally, in the
category of harm, does it somehow prevent you from actually finding and developing
a meaningful relationship with that one special person who can fulfill your
relationship needs. It very well may
qualify as an addiction. Dating
companies understand this, and that is why they always feature pictures of the
most attractive people they can so as to lure you on…trust me, Casanova, most
of these photos are professional models who are not members on the sites.
In the end, much of this is like the question about
alcohol. Is it bad to have one glass of
wine at night on occasion? Can it lead
to addiction? Most certainly. Is it addiction? No, not at that point. Generally the one question that has to be
answered in the affirmative about addiction is susceptibility to the trap, and
the strength of the “drug” you are fooling with…and most importantly, does it
cause harm.
Needless to say, you need to carefully consider these
potential traps in life and avoid them.